Idle Hands
by GeminiScar
Summary: AU Naruto is confused, and had scared away the only person who could hae helped him figure things out, leaving him with only one option: Ask his best friend--and total asshole--for advice. ONESHOT


Idle Hands A.N. Hey, here's a one shot that just wont leave me. Hope its worth your time.

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, I wouldn't need Fanficion. But since I do…..**

Idle Hands

It was official. Kiba was making it all up. There was no way that he, Naruto Uzumaki, could possibly be gay. Naruto shook his head and adjusted the strap of his shoulder bag and scuffed the orange toe of his sneaker into the sidewalk.

So what if he'd gotten drunk at the last party and made out with Neji. The guy had hair longer than Ino's, and was almost as feminine as Sakura. Hell, the only one who can even come close to matching Neji in the metro-sexual category was Sasuke, and Naruto had been best friends with the Uchiha for four years, hell they'd been rivals for ten, and he'd never had the urge to throw him down and play tonsil-hockey.

Sure they'd shared that accidental kiss in middle school, and sure he'd found himself watching Sasuke's ass once and wondering if it was tight enough to turn coal into diamonds, but that proved absolutely nothing. Yet, Kiba was convinced that Naruto was deluding himself into thinking he wanted the fair Sakura when he truly batted for the other team.

Kiba was delusional.

At least, Naruto thought he was. After the confrontation after the party, Naruto had found himself noticing things around him and questioning the little things. Like why he didn't get turned on when the soccer team—himself included—raided the girl's locker room, and why he got all uppity when some freshman or football player draped themselves over Sasuke. Girl's did it all the time, and Naruto just laughed at him, but when the guys did it—though he knew that Sasuke could and would break their arm—his stomach knotted and not in the disgusted way.

Which was why he found himself walking over to Sasuke's house after practice. He'd threatened Kiba with death and ran him off, so that left one person he knew that could help him. Sasuke had admitted to being homosexual several years back at one of Kiba's bashes—the only party the dark teen had ever been to, and with good reason—which ended in Sasuke doing a strip tease on the coffee table. Apparently he'd been annoyed with all the female attention, and after a few drinks, and then the dance, he'd yelled at Ino for grabbing his butt and proclaimed his stand point, followed quickly by his addmition that he could probably give better blow jobs than any girl alive. He'd then promptly passed out.

Somehow, that only made him more popular with the girls.

"Only Sasuke…." Naruto shook his head as the quiet house came into view. The cream colored siding blended with the others on the street, and it was easy to forget that the two heirs to the Uchiha Corporation lived there, but then again, after the accident that had meant to take Sasuke as well as his parents, that was probably Itachi's goal.

Naruto knew that Sasuke's older brother and current guardian was currently away on business for the week, so grabbed the spare key from the hanging plant and let himself in. He'd been doing it for years, and Itachi stopped complaining long ago.

The house was mostly quiet but he could hear the echo of running water and the beat of music from upstairs. Naruto removed his shoes—having learned the first time how important carpet was after the maid chased him around with the vacuum when he was twelve—and made his way up the stairs.

If anyone could answer his questions, it would be Sasuke. Sure the jackass would call him some names and probably smirk and make his life hell, but Naruto would get conclusions, and anonymity.

As he hit the landing the music became clearer and Naruto lifted a golden brow at the blaring pop music.

_What the hell…I know he's gay, but I know Sasuke has better taste than that…_ Naruto smiled walking over to Sasuke's bedroom door, the only one that had any decoration—A poster of Stewey from Family Guy that Naruto had bought for his thirteenth birthday stating; Because I like you, when I rule the world your death shall be quick and painless—and pushed it open.

The driving beat of the music was loud and obnoxious and Naruto snorted when he recognized the song as well as the artist. _If this isn't on the radio he has no excuse. _Naruto grinned, already plotting the years of torment.

Gay or not, no man listened to Pink while showering.

"Hey, Sasuke what are you—" Naruto's sentence and mocking laugh died in his throat, jaw dropped, mouth suddenly dry as his bag hit the floor with hardly a sound.

Sasuke had chosen to leave his bathroom door open. It would have been fine if he'd drawn the curtain but he hadn't. Nope, instead Naruto had a clear view of Sasuke's profile, his hands threaded through damp hair that glistened with water and clung to damp skin. Water ran in rivulets over the slender contours of the perfect physique, clinging to slim hips curling around tight buttocks and muscled thighs. The hair on Sasuke's body was surprisingly light considering its color and Naruto almost wondered if Sasuke shaved is legs for a moment.

Now he'd seen Sasuke shower before, and yes he'd admitted that the other looked good, and even effeminate, but watching the Uchiha standing shoulder width apart rolling his hips, shoulders, and bending slightly in the knees as he danced to the music blasting from the stereo was a whole new experience.

He wanted to laugh, god did he want to say that the view was amusing and slightly disturbing, but it really wasn't, and Naruto couldn't force a laugh out no matter how hard he tried. He was simply frozen.

Naruto couldn't breath, eyes locked on those hips, those pale, rolling hips that at the moment look so very inviting, moved just like a girls, only as he'd boasted before with his mouth skills, the tight rotations seemed almost better. More controlled.

His pants felt a little too tight as fingers trailed down from the hair, flinging water droplets and causing a few strands to rise back up into Sasuke's usual hair-style before the water pressure pushed it back down. His shoulder rolled as the finger trailed over his collarbone, down his chest, across his toned stomach, trailed through coarse pubic hair, cupped his hip as he rolled into the motion, knees bending so he could smooth over his thigh before he arched his back, gracefully rising to his feet and swooping above him only for those fingers to curl into wet ebony and fist, pulling clinging bangs away from thin cheeks.

Naruto groaned low at the satisfied smirk on pale lips and the beads of water that clung to dark lashes as Sasuke continued to dance with his eyes closed under the spray, lips parting to mouth along—or sing, he couldn't tell with the music as loud as it was—with the song. Naruto's belly was burning his entire body sensitized by the erotic sight his best friend made.

He'd missed the strip tease at Kiba's party, having a game the next morning, and suddenly wished he hadn't. Fuck, no wonder his preferences meant shit, Sasuke was Aphrodite trapped in a male body on exstasy.

Naruto's fingers itched to touch that skin he knew was soft from wrestling with the boy, and his body ached to press close, to bite that perfect skin and mark it as his own, to hold those hips and feel each movement and to be so close to that tight little diamond making butt-hole.

Naruto swallowed thickly, his knees quaking as one hand shifted to press against his painful erection in his pants. Damn he'd never been so hard in his life, as Sasuke made the panting noses with the beat, pushing his hair up like a girl but somehow more dangerous as he rolled and bucked.

Naruto tried to focus on those lips reading the words that formed there as well as hearing them, and at some corner of his mind he realized why Sasuke would listen to the song, it was so very him, but at the moment the words only burned him to the core, and Naruto pressed and rubbed at him self slightly to ease the pain of his heart beating in his dick as the chorus came in and Sasuke lifted his hands above his head, letting ink curtain his face as wrists locked like he was chained and he dipped to the beat.

_**I'm not here for your entertainment!**_

_**You don't really wanna mess with me tonight.**_

_**Just stop and take a second…**_

_**I was fine before you walked into my life!**_

'_**Cause you know its over,**_

_**Before it began.**_

_**Keep your drink just give me the money!**_

_**Just you and your hand tonight!**_

Naruto shuddered as the words continued, and he watched Sasuke twist beneath the water like a tempting sin, realizing just what the others saw—what they missed out on seeing—in the raven-haired teen all because they hounded him. Naruto tried recalling a time that Sasuke had ever gone clubbing with the group, realizing that the other rarely went, and if he did he never danced, because of the unwanted attention.

Suddenly Naruto was angry and pleased at the fact. He'd missed out on seeing this but so had everyone else. Sasuke's hands ran down his stomach and slid over his sides and Naruto reached out to grab the door jam when his body pulsed and trembled, heat coiling tightly in his loins. He let out a needy pant when Sasuke threw his head back, exposing the long column of his neck, slender and graceful, corded with muscle, his Adam's apple a small shadow on the skin.

He pulled his hair back, smirking as he mouthed the spoken word break in the music, head tilting to the side, and lowering under the spray, and Naruto fisted his other hand to keep from reaching out, just as black eyes filled with mirth, sensual teasing, and fire opened and locked on his.

Shock registered as the chorus blasted through the room and Sasuke straightened, a pretty flush on his cheeks and Naruto felt his insides coil tighter still, eyes focused on those lips as a dark brow raised and the lips formed the one word he was dying to hear from them.

"Dobe?"

His body seized up, the heat snapping back and then his knees turned to jelly sending him to his ass. Naruto breathed heavily eyes glazed barely registering as Sasuke jumped from the shower, hitting the stereo off as he grabbed a towel and knelt before him.

"Hey, Naruto? You all right? Dobe…"

Slowly, as though crawling through thick mud, Naruto resurfaced, and looked up into Sasuke's confused and concerned eyes.

"You hit your head?"

Naruto felt as though he'd been slugged in the gut as heat instantly flooded his cheeks at the familiar sticky feel in his shorts. _I… I just blew a load… watching… watching…_

"..ah… ah…hah…" Naruto couldn't form a single thought much less a word to say to his best friend whom he'd just thourally mind and eye raped, feeling guilt and embarrassment consume his fifteen-year-old mind.

"Naruto?" Sasuke set a hand on his shoulder and Naruto shuddered violently from the sound of the voice, his name, and the damp touch. Sasuke's eyebrows drew down and he studied Naruto a moment before they suddenly dilated after resting on his lap.

Naruto gasped, looking down to see his hand still pressed to his—now wet—crotch, and darkened at the pale hand that touched his own. _Oh, fuck, he's going to kill me! _Jerking his eyes up, Naruto opened his mouth to start apologizing but nearly swallowed his tongue at the teasing smirk and intense eyes that locked with his own.

He knew.

The god damned bastard knew!

"_Naruto," _His name was practically purred and it made Naruto shiver even as he felt the urge to pound the smug bastard's face in. "What are you doing here, dobe?"

Naruto didn't answer.

In a move that surprised both of them Naruto leaped to his feet and bolted from the room, down the stairs and out the door leaving his shoes and bag exactly where they were. _Fuck, shit, damn, piss, cock-sucking, mother-fucker…_Naruto ran through every curse he knew as he pushed himself faster and harder down the sidewalk toward his house.

He wouldn't stop until he was safe in his room, and god willing he wouldn't have to see Sasuke until after he'd managed to lobotomize himself, because now he just knew that if he ever heard that fucking song again, he'd get a hard on. "DAMN IT!"

It was official.

**A.N. Okay, so here it is my fun story, any way the song belongs to Pink, titled: U + Ur Hand, and I lay no claim to it. But please review.**


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